Unwanted and Unloved
by Stars in the Sunshine
Summary: What do we really know about Ryan Evan's life. It's all behind closed doors for now, but what happens when someone opens them up? This is my first HSM story.
1. being the punchingbag

**Disclaimer:: i don't own High School Musical.. cause if i did, everything would be a bit more sad and dramatic... maybe. Before you read this you should know that while i was writing it, i cried. i truly did. ily. **

**Unloved and Unwanted**

Ryan Evans sat in his bedroom crying. With every cry that excaped from his body, the gashes on his back seemed to tear open again. Ryan didn't want to admit it, because he never thought he would be thinking of this, but he was thinking of killing himself. Right then and there. He was unloved. He was unwanted. He was badically any 'un' word you could think of.

His mother father had divorced, but his mother had gained custody of only Sharpay. Ryan was to live with his dad. Ever since the divorce, Ryan had been being beaten every night, weather he did something wrong or not. See, his father was an alcoholic.

Sharpay and Ryan still went to East High, but since the split, she had bee completly ignoring him. Before, Ryan was in her shadow, but people still noticed him. Now, he was alone. No one talked to him. Not even Martha or Kelsi. He had offically became the school's outsider. Ms. Darbus didn't even _look_ at him anymore.

Although, the basketball team had become very interested in Ryan. When ever they had a problem, or they were full of anger, or they just wanted something to do, Ryan was there. He was their punching-bag. He had been beaten up by the basketball team may times. And when he would start crying out in pain, they would just laugh at him. Tears would be rolling down his face and blood would be pouring out of wounds, and they would just stand there and laugh.

Ryan remembered one when he was getting beat up by Troy and his basketball boys, Sharpay had come. He was glad to see her. He thought she would make Troy and everyone else stop and she would rescue him, but she didn't. She just stood there, and by what Ryan could see... she was laughing along like everyone else. Ryan's eyes had begged and pleaded for her to do something, anything. But she didn't. She just laughed along with the basketball team and other students who were watching. She just laughed along as her brother, her own twin, was crying and screaming out in pain. Hot tears were falling to the ground with every punch and blood was flowing out of Ryan so quickly. No one stopped to think about why so much blood was excaping him. No one cared. They just needed a pick-me-up becasue of their bad day, and Ryan was the best solution.

More tears excaped from Ryan's closed eyes. He didn't like to think about it.

Sharpay and his mother had no idea what was going on behind the closed doors of the house he lived in. No one could see the pain behind his delicate eyes that had seen and experienced too much in his young life. No one noticed the bruises on his arms from his father's hands or the cuts on his back from his father's belt. No one knew how he cried almost every minute of every day. No one knew about what was happening to him, but if they did, he didn't think they'd care.

Well, maybe there was someone. His mother... possibily. She loved him, although he hadn't talked to her in the past 7 months... since the divorce. Maybe there was someone else, but he doubted it. Ms. May, his teacher for the newest elective at East High [the subject is Life... everyday things like relationships, parents, friends, etc... She was nice and kind. She was also fresh out of college, about 24 years old. She was the All-American Girl and the Good Girl and the Sweetheart. She was never mean, she was basically like a teenager herself.

In the last few weeks, Ms. May had been treating Ryan alittle differently. She had been giving him more attention lately. He figured she just noticed the sad boy who always had his head down and who sat in the back corner of the room. Yeah, right! She probably heard or saw one of the beatings he'd gotten from the basketball team. It's not that he didn't mind her giving him more attention, it's just that... he didn't want anyone's pity, mainly because no one had ever given a lot of attention before.

Ryan sighed. He didn't really want to do this. Kill himself, things could turn out ok. _Or you could turn up dead by either your father or Troy and his boys. _The voice in the back of his head said.

Ryan looked down. He wasn't wearing a shirt and he could see all the gashes and bruises on his torso. He didn't like it. He didn't like the way it looked, the way it felt, or why he had gotten them.

Ryan laid down on his bed and turned the light out. He wasn't going to kill himself. He didn't want to be selfish and do this for himself. Although, in the long run, this would be better for everyone.

**A/N- So??? What'd ya think? Too sad? Not sad enough? I'm thinking of turning this into a story not just a oneshot... should i? Please review and give me your creative thoughts. ily. -caitlin.**


	2. A Normal Day At School

**Disclaimer:: i don't own HSM, nuff said. So, i think i'm gonna turn this into a stroy... so, here ya go. ily.**

Ryan walked down the hallway at school towards his locker. Halfway there, he spotted Sharpay at her locker talking to her current boyfriend, Zeke Baylor. Ryan didn't know what to do. If Zeke saw him, he would surely get the basketball team as quick as he could. He stood there in the middle of the hallway, not doing anything, hoping he wouldn't be noticed.

Ryan heard Sharpay laugh and he saw her hug Zeke. As much as Ryan didn't want to think about it, he wanted a hug from his sister. Or maybe that was just too much to ask. A glance would've been nice. A simple 'hi' would've worked perfectly. He actually wanted some kind of reconization from her. If she started yelling at him for no reason, that would've been fine too. But just as usual, he didn't get anything.

Ryan walked quitley past Zeke and Sharpay with his head bent. A few minutes later he arrived at his locker. It was the one with 'FAGGOT' carved into the front it. He was used to it by now.

Everything throughout the day was the same. Teachers ignoring him. Kids laughing at him. People tripping him in the hallway. No one letting him sit with them at lunch. During the day, Ms. May had walked by Ryan and smiled at him. He didn't know that just one normal, nice smile from someone could make him feel so much better.

During 6th period, his elective class Life, was talking about parents. Ryan, being the one who sat in the corner, was basically not taking part in this topic. Ms. May noticed.

"Ryan," His head jerked up. Ms. May smiled. Everyone was staring at him. "What do you think about your parents?"

_I hate them. I hate being beaten and I hate my mom not talking to me and leaving me with dad! _The voice in his head screamed. But he couldn't say that. "Uhh... they're ok." He said dully.

"Just ok? You have any anger towards them?" She asked sweetly.

_More than you know. _"No." he said, just as dully as before.

"Ok." Ms. May said and moved on with her lesson, although she didn't completly believe him.

After school, Ryan was walking home. He was... gald for a change. He had stayed alittle later than normal today at school and because of that, Troy and the basketball team were already in practice. He wouldn't get beat up today.

"Hey Evans!"

Ryan stopped dead in his tracks. That was Troy's voice.

"Guess what? Basketball practice has been cancled today!"

Ryan's eyes widened. He knew what was coming.

"So, ya know what that means?" Troy asked, now standing inches away from Ryan. His team was standing behind him with their arms crossed.

Ryan gluped. "Yeah." He wanted you yell back at Troy and hurt him and the whole basketball team like they had him, but his voice came out as a week whipser.

Before Ryan knew it, he was on the ground with tears flowing easily out of his eyes. With every kick to his stmoach, he could feel more and more blood trickle down his back from gashes that had been towrn open. He struggled to open his eyes with all of the pain he was consuming, but he could see students standing around. They were all laughing, mocking, talking to their friends, and some where walking by, not even noticing what was going on.

Troy laughed as he continued kicking Ryan in his stomach. The tean joined in and they kicked and punched Ryan on any and every expoised part of his body. By now, there was blood everywhere. Finally, after about 10 minutes, the team and Troy stopped.

Troy bent low to Ryan's face and snarrled. "You're a worthless piece of shit, you know that?" Troy slapped Ryan across the face. "I bet you were a mistake consindering your parents don't care."

Everyone around them laughed at what Troy had said. Then they all left with burised, bleeding Ryan still laying on the ground.

Ryan was now pulling into the driveway at 'home'. He didn't have a home. No one wanted him there. Not his dad. Not this dad's 'friends', not even the mailman liked him.

Ryan opened the door slowly for two reasons. 1.) he was late and for sure his father would be angry and 2.) he was sore. Ryan stepped into the open doorway and looked into the house. It was quiet and dark. There were no lights on. He looked out through the open doorway and saw his father's car. His eyes widened. He knew his father was waiting for him somewhere in the house.

Ryan stepped completely into the house and shut the door behind him. He started walking towards the stairs as quickly as he could.

"Hello Ryan," a voice behind him said calmly.

_Shit._

**A/N- So? Did you like it? Yeah yeah yeah, I know I cussed in this. And there will prolly be more in it. Sorry, but I think it adds more to the story. Please review. I want your creative critisim. ily. -caitlin. **


	3. IMs and a Beat Down

**A/N -- Hey everyone! Sorry it's been a while. We've been having a lot of exams at my school - State Testing at the end of the year, so I haven't had a lot of time. Plus, my brother hogging the computer doesn't help. lol. **

**Disclaimer -- Sadly, I don't own High School Musical, or Ryan Evans. D;**

**Last Time: **

Ryan was now pulling into the driveway at 'home'. He didn't have a home. No one wanted him there. Not his dad. Not this dad's 'friends', not even the mailman liked him.

Ryan opened the door slowly for two reasons. 1.) he was late and for sure his father would be angry and 2.) he was sore. Ryan stepped into the open doorway and looked into the house. It was quiet and dark. There were no lights on. He looked out through the open doorway and saw his father's car. His eyes widened. He knew his father was waiting for him somewhere in the house.

Ryan stepped completely into the house and shut the door behind him. He started walking towards the stairs as quickly as he could.

"Hello Ryan," a voice behind him said calmly.

_Shit._

**End of Last Time oh, by the way, cursing will be in this story, so if it bothers you, sorry. **

Ryan's blood ran cold at the sound of his father's voice. He was supposed to be home an hour ago. Ryan heart started thumping harder, his mind started racing. He knew he would be punished... badly, but he didn't know what he was going to be punished _with_.

"Well, we sure are late this evening, arn't we?" His father, Daniel, stood up and started walking slowly towards the scared blue eyed boy.

"Why are you late, Ryan? Get beat up again?" Daniel laughed. He knew all about Ryan's beatings at school. That made Daniel want to hurt Ryan more... He thought Ryan was a pansy for not being able to take a few beatings at school. Therefore, he thought if he hit Ryan more, and worse, that would toughen him up. It didn't. Also, beating his son was one of the high points of his day. It was his moment to let go.

"Well...?" Daniel asked impaciently. He was waiting for an answer.

"Yes." Ryan answered emotionless.

"You pansy!" Daniel yelled. He punched Ryan in the stomach. Ryan doubled over, falling to the ground.

Daniel pulled off his belt and swung it down hard on the teen's back. Ryan screamed out in pain. The same thing went on for 10 minutes then Daniel dully kicked Ryan over and looked it dead in the eye. "If you ever disobay be again, you're gonna be dead." He said in a slured voice.

Daniel grabbed is coat and keys and walked ou the front door while his son lay there, bleeding badly.

**HSMHSM**

Ryan sat in his room after bandaging up his body. He sighed as he sat down at his desk. He woke up his computer and the second the screan lit up, there were IM messages waiting for him to read. He knew who they were from, and what they'd say, but he always read them anyways.

**Message 1 from- theTROYanator: **ur such an idiot. and sooooooo gaaaayyyyyy! how do u even show urself at school? ur a piece of white trash that no1 wants or loves. so just go die.

Ryan read it and sighed, it's along the same lines as all the other messages he gets from 'theTROYanator'. He opened the next one.

**Message 2 from- BasketballBaker: **no1 really likes u ryan. i mean, ur mom and ur sister don't. i know fer sure that shar don't give a shit about u. yer mom makes u live wit ur daddy. i bet ur own daddy don't even like u. i don't. and neither does any1 else - guess that's and understatement.

Ryan deleted that one too. He thought about Sharpay. Sure she never appricated him, always called him gay even though there was more chance of her being gay than him. See, Ryan was dressed the way he was dressed and acted the way he acted because Sharpay wanted everything he did to put the attention on her. Since they don't even talk aymore, Ryan always wears jeans and t-shirts now. No more sparkle hats and tucked in designer shirts. He was glad too, he hated being the dress up doll.

**Message 3 from- Kelsi3ThePlaymaker: **u've seemed really distant lately. ryan, i know ur sad. but live life and do something different. i know i don't really talk to you anymore and sorry, but i'm not planning on it i just want to see u do something with ur life.

This message made Ryan smile. In his musical days, he always thought of Kelsi as a sister/friend, although Sharpay would never let him have a real conversation with her. So the only way they could talk was on the computer though IMs. The break-up of his parents was around the same time Kelsi started dating Jason. Ryan was happy there was someone like Jason. Jason didn't help out with the beatings the basketball team gave Ryan. He didn't try and make them stop, but he didn't help beat the crap out of him either. And Jason treated Kelsi right. Gave her the world and anything else she wanted. Always made her smile. They'd been going strong for the past 7 months. Everyone says they'll end up getting married. Ryan didn't doubt that. Kelsi deserved him after being raised with no parents - she lived in a all girl orphange. Then someone adotped her when she was about 10, but he ended up being a child molester. You can only imagine what happened to her. Then when she was about 13 she had to battle cancer alone. And no one wants to adopt a dying teenage girl. So, when she turned 16, last year, she was given 500 and sent on her way, no longer legally alowed to stay at the orphange. So she stayed with Gabi until she started dating Jason. Now she lives with Jason with his little sister, Ginny, and his parents. Ryan knew all of this because of there IMs. They were good friends until she started dating Jason.

Instead of deleating that message, Ryan kept it. He liked knowing that even though she won't really talk to him in the real world, she still kind of cares. And that was enough for Ryan.

Ryan tured off the computer and layed on his bed. He wasn't happy with his life - anyone within a 10 mile radius could see that. But anyone living his life would've killed themselves by know. True, there were times Ryan wanted to die. Just to fall off the face of the earth, but something in his gut told him just to keep hanging on. That somehow, someway, things were going to change. For the better or worse, Ryan didn't know. He closed his eyes and swiftly fell off to sleep, knowing that in a matter of hours he would be awaken to another beating.

**So, what'd you think? leave comments with any kind of critisim. I take it well. lol. Oh, and do you think I should make a seprate story with more about the Jason and Kelsi thing? Cause all of that just kinda came to me while I was typing. And I kinda like it. Tell me what you think. - jenna**


End file.
